Some advice was given to me today from someone I would consider full of wisdom. If you are going through depression, postpartum, anxiety, or just to much going on in your daily life remember a few things.
Just some tips;
Stay around positive people. If you find yourself being consumed by others problems and negative attitudes, which they may be having a rough day you know. But when you are depressed etc. its all you can do to handle your own life. Its ok too. Sometimes you have to be kinda selfish. Its not that you dont care about them, its that their problems will consume you. You will stay up all night worrying about their problems and end up with your own anxiety attack. The next day they will more than likely be in a great mood and you are going through hell. Keep this in mind and see what happens. As you get stronger you will be able to handle more. But if you are at a low point just stay by positive and caring people.
I hate to sound like I dont like people because I do, but there are alot of folks who rant and rave, bring you down and know what you are going through but dont mind adding a little more stress to you. Stay away for a while. Some people actually enjoy seeing others low and having problems. Sounds bad but I have seen it ad been through it many times. Its just not important right now. Take time to get healthy before you start trying to help others with their problems. I know. Believe me. I try to be a good person but will take every problem that I hear and worry about them until Im sick.
If you start hearing negative things just walk away, you have your own shit to deal with right now. It is hard to think positive when your constantly around negative people. There will be a time when you can help them, but maybe it is you that needs the help right now. Find someone who will listen and help you for a change. Which may be a hard thing to do. If you do this for a few weeks you will be amazed at how much your stress level will go down.
Phone calls have a way of either cheering you up or bringing your whole damn day to a fing depression. Its ok not to answer the phone if you know its just going to be a bunch of negative crap. Let the phone go for a while if possible. You can talk to positive people. Try it for a few weeks. I couldn't belive how much better I felt. Try not to answer the phone for a whole day and watch your stress level go down.
When you are at work and you do your job, talk to positive people, and just go home. It will make you feel better. Although I dont know quite what to tell you if your boss is always negative. Try selective hearing I guess.
I got to the point where my doctors were telling me not to even watch the news. Bunch of bad news, disasters, murders, on and on. I have to admit it helped although I thought they were crazy.
Live, love, laugh, and stay postitive. Its a hard thing to do and I get off track quite often. It usually takes me getting sick to realize the crap I'm listening to and the shit I'm taking from everyone to make my attitude change.
Try to just focus on your own life for a few weeks. Your family, kids. Although sometimes family are the ones who bring you down. Most of the time there is someone in your family who has wisdom, can give great advice, and will actually listen. They have been through alot and dont mind sharing it. Only with a positive spin because they are older and full of wisdom.
I love to listen to older people. It is relaxing in a way. They have been through most everything we are going through but have learned how to handle life, people, problems. They will tell you how everything is just a part of your life that you go through and although it seems so big right now, it really isnt. Things have a way of working themselves out. And if you think about it they always do.
We will worry about things for months or weeks ahead of time and it usually never turns out the way you think it will. Its usually better and then I think how I wasted all of those days or weeks worrying about something that never even happened.
Try to let life take care of itself. You really arent in control. Take a few weeks and just role with life. You know that the things you are going through will change in days, weeks, maybe months. If we try to have a positive attitude and just realize we arent in contol of everything, things will work out, our lives would be so much simpler.
Make a choice to take care of yourself. Your emotiions, your health and happiness. And set the negative people and things aside for a while you will see a change. Your minds are most likely full of your own problems. Dont try to handle everything in one day. Set aside the outside influences and handle your stuff one thing at a time. God Bless All of You and let me know if it works.
Saturday, November 7, 2009
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Tammy, have I given you an award yet, if not let me know.
ReplyDeleteBIG BIG HUGS
you deserve an award
hey bob hope you doing ok thanks for always letting me know your still around... No I haven't ever received an award. I would know if I had right? You all listening and giving me advice when needed is enough though bob. Thanks for saying I deserve one made my night. Big Hugs; Tammy
ReplyDeleteSooooo important to stay positive, and only surround yourself w/ positive people. The negs. just drain the poop out of you, don't they?
ReplyDeleteThe good energy you feel from friends really does make you better, physically. The negs. can actually make you sick. Stay away from them!
That's certainly worth considering. Now if only I could find some positive people...
ReplyDeleteIt does seem like pretty sound advice though, finding and spending time with positive people (though truly positive people seem to be few and far between), because focusing on myself only reminds me of who I am.
But I guess part of finding a positive person could also involve trusting that person enough to allow them to help you no? I know that's something I certainly should try to work on this week/month/year...
My words may be rambling, but your words are encouraging. I do appreciate your writings.