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Tuesday, September 1, 2009

HISTORECTOMY: Guys may not want to read.

YEP, Guess what? I became anemic, or had very little iron in my body. Didn't stop bleeding for months and months. I was on a high dose of iron everyday, but I do have to say that I thought I was tired when I was going through postpartum, this was a whole different tired. I remember feeling like I weighed a thousand pounds. It was so exhausting to even go to the restroom. When I would take a shower you could see the veins or my legs would turn a purplish color. The iron was working a little at a time but took months and months. Finally had an iron level that would enable me to see the doctor. I had horrible pain in my stomach, no appetite, losing so much weight. And a tired that I have never felt before. Still was bleeding, and not just a little. I finally, after being stupid for years asked my doctor what a normal blood loss was when you are on your period and then told her what I was doing. She said that I was losing more blood in a month than most women do in six. ..... So anyway they took all of the tests. Turned out that I had several cysts on my uterus, endometriosis on both ovaries. It looked horrible. They said that I needed a hysterectomy; Great more medical bills and no insurance again. This was a pretty big fight between my husband and I. I guess he thought I could wait. But then again he wasn't the one that had laid in bed for two years. So my parents paid for the operation and they gave me a full hysterectomy. It was really going to be a relief, I had been going through menopause for a year anyway, they said that they could leave an ovary in so that I wouldn't go through menopause but I figured I couldn't get any more crazy than I had been a few years ago. Plus we have so much cancer in our family with the women and why would they leave it in? It looked like worms all over it. Full of endometriosis. Take it all.... Should be an easy surgery I thought. I've been through allot worse. Ok well, I get out and just start puking over and over again. I thought my insides, or what was left of them were going to come out. Surgeries are pretty neat now in the way that they can just make little holes. Not really even any scars to speak of. I started getting an anxiety attack and the nurse wouldn't give me medication. I told her "You seriously don't want to not give me my medication, and I don't even think you can do that Ive been on it for ten years." She said that the doctor hadn't ordered it. This just upset me worse and here went the numbness, shaking, sweating. I embarrassed my husband. I said call the damn doctor now and get me something for anxiety!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm ashamed of what a bitch I can be when I'm in pain, but its mostly when I'm scared or going through anxiety attacks. He told me to settle down. I told him to shut the hell up until he has had one. lol. I wasn't in the hospital for long and all in all I felt pretty good. My mom and dad were now living about 20 minutes from a hospital so I went there. Once again she was helping me with my kids. I started on the pills, I don't even know what they were, but the ones for menopause. I guess they help keep women from going crazy. Hormone pills maybe? I was doing it all right. Got out of bed, walking around so that I didn't get pneumonia in my bad lung from the back surgery, making sure that I was taking care of myself. Started feeling weird, like I was getting the flu. I would wake my older daughter up two or three times a night to put me in the shower. I was either freezing or sweating. At first I thought it was just the hot flashes from menopause. But it felt different to me. I felt like when I went to sleep I wasn't going to wake up; Then

3 comments:

  1. You have been through so much and these are just words of inspiration: What does not kill you, makes you stronger. It already seems like you have come out of this stronger.

    http://temmyno1.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks so much for comment. I remind myself of that most days. I dont remember where I'm at in my blog cause I cant remember anything, but I went to the emergency room last week cause I couldnt breathe and they asked if I had saw my back doctor lately. NO. Anyway apparently, well actually cause I have the xrays, my spine looks like a boomerang. It is so bad I dont even want to think about it. It is so curved that my good lung is being affected and they said I may need surgery again. I just dont know if I can do that. Again, helps so much to talk, or write, thanks for reading and commenting.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dear LFN, all I can offer is to include you in my prayers and hope that you will find solace inspite of the pain. God bless.
    BM

    ReplyDelete

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